* I know I shouldn't laugh

But this email I received from Herc's teacher today had me roaring:

"I also wanted to let you know that Hercules has been rolling up pieces of paper today and putting them in his mouth, which makes it look like he has a cigarette in his mouth. When I asked him why he was doing this, he told me it wasn't a cigarette, but it was like a piece of tree bark like [The Diva] puts in her mouth (I'm thinking maybe she uses a cinnamon stick?) However, I have told him at least 4 times today to get the papers out of his mouth because that's not acceptable at school. If you could address this at home tonight it would be great. :) In his writing story today he wrote that if he was a cat he would be in a club and they would smoke and drink beer. We had to talk about how this was inappropriate to write, too."

Just to clear things up:

  • The Diva has been using cinnamon sticks as a sort of placebo because she is trying to quit smoking.
  • Hercules returned home from The Diva's house to find Pa practicing with his bandmates (I was in class). He joined in their jam session by playing the spoons. When I woke him up this morning the first words out of his mouth were "When I'm 12 will I be old enough to join The Bait Shop Boys?"

I hadn't realized how the naughty hillbilly jazz would infiltrate my son's impressionable young mind. Cats who smoke and drink beer, hmm?


Blogger Veronica said...

"Cats who smoke and drink beer, hmm?"

At least they're not beating, shooting, or maiming anyone?

2/09/2006 12:39 PM  
Blogger new_eyes said...

"We had to talk about how this was inappropriate to write, too."

Doesn't she care what's on his mind? What's inappropriate? Were these to be read in front of the class, I could understand, but otherwise let him write whats on his mind.

Plus, no doubt he was talking about HEP CATS, not "cats".

The teacher sounds like a thin lipped Miss Beazley type with her hair up too tight.

Maybe Rio should write about unicorns and lollipops.

dang feminists bringing their church of Mother Earth into our public schools! I hope he kicks her in the shins.

2/09/2006 2:57 PM  
Anonymous renee said...

easy jackson, watch what you say about mrs. b - i LOVE her. a feminist she is not. and i don't know many first grade teachers who would encourage smoking and drinking among their students. sheesh.

don't make me ban you, jackson. i'll kick YOU in the shins;)

2/09/2006 3:42 PM  
Blogger new_eyes said...

no , seriously.

is she married? what's she look like?

I take all that back, from before.

2/09/2006 4:02 PM  
Anonymous renee said...

did i say she wasn't a feminist? what i meant was she's a militant anarchist. and yeah, she's married. that's what MRS means.

take your desperation elsewhere, jackson.

btw, i noticed you have a new blog. be careful. it starts out as an innocent hobby, and then next thing you know you haven't left your apartment in 6 weeks because you can't stop feeding the trolls.

don't do it!

2/09/2006 6:08 PM  
Blogger new_eyes said...

well i don't think an antichrist should be teaching Rio is all.

2/09/2006 7:33 PM  
Blogger momma-yaya said...

Sigh. This reminds me so much of my son J (although I think I like Hercules' writing subjects much more than my son's interests in bloody things and terrifying creatures). I wish I could offer a great anecdote about how it all worked out in the end for J, but since I ran away from the school situation and am now desperately trying to figure out how to pay for the tutor next month, I can't do that. But I know that the teacher's hands are tied on this matter. I think all my son's issues revolve around this word, "appropriate." I think he hates all that is appropriate.

2/10/2006 6:27 AM  
Blogger Renee May said...

I sympathize, yaya! Hercules also cringes when he hears that word "appropriate."

Good luck with that tutor!

2/13/2006 7:31 AM  

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